I am the father of six daughters.
I am teaching my daughters that there are three “must have” characteristics for the men they date. I am teaching them so well that the other day when I started down the list, one of my girls said, “I know! I know!” and then she finished the list!
Wanna know the list? Here it is:
#1 He has to honor God.
I want for any man that dates my daughter to realize that he’s not the final word on any matter. I want him to believe that there is someone bigger, smarter, richer, and more powerful than he. I want him to live with the humility that comes with this awareness. I want him also to live with the confidence that comes with knowing that God is around him.
A man that lives with an awareness of the presence of a powerful person will be a good man to/for my girls.
#2 He has to have a job.
Son, my daughter is not your mamma who works so you can stay home and play video games. You get your bum off the couch and get a job. Make some money. Build something. Sell something. Organize something.
You set your own alarm clock and don’t make her beg you to get out of bed in the morning to go to work.
You take the initiative to go to bed early enough so that you get a good night’s sleep so that you can be a productive member of our society.
If times are tough financially, you be the first out the door to get a second job. She may choose to have a career, and I support her in this fully, but son… your job is to have a job so you can care for that lady beside you.
And by the way… don’t expect her to be driving you around and buying you stuff while you’re dating. She’s neither your bank account nor your personal transportation service. I’m teaching her to hate debt and laziness. Know where I’m going with this?
#3 He has to take responsibility for himself and the family he creates.
Son, my girl wants a husband… not a son. I expect that you’ll take responsibility for yourself. Don’t make her be your mom. You know what I mean… cleaning up after you, calling in sick for you, getting the family to church because you won’t help or go, making sure the oil is changed in the car… you get the point.
I don’t want my daughter calling me asking me to do what you should be doing. By then I’ll have raised my family. Now it’ll be your turn to raise yours.
I’ll pray for you and help you as far as I can… but I can’t/won’t assume your role. You are her man… and if I have to be then there’s no use in you being around anymore. Know what I mean?
OK, I know I’ve got a few years before my daughters are dating/marrying so I might mellow out a bit in terms of how I express myself on these matters, but I don’t see myself changing the matters themselves.
I’m training my daughters to expect these things in man, so if you don’t do/have these things… you’ll probably not date my daughters…ever. And they’re pretty ones so you’re going to want to! My suggestion? Do these things! Not only will be you an eligible suitor but you’ll be a better man too!