The following is me wrestling with counsel from Mother Teresa. (Take from the book Mother Teresa: No Greater Love)
CAVEAT: I do not purport to be anything close to an equal of this amazing lady. I am simply a traveler processing what she has taught…
“Do not pursue spectacular deeds. We must deliberately renounce all desires to see the fruit of our labor, doing all we can as best we can, leaving the rest in the hands of God. What matters is the gift of your self, the degree of love that you put into each one of your actions.”
I want to see the “fruit” of my labor! I want to see results! I am not content with “the best I can” even if it is full of love. What if “the best I can” is not enough? What if I haven’t learned enough or been wise enough in my efforts? What if I did what I did with a lot of love but was unwise in its application? I want to see results.
“Do not allow yourselves to be disheartened by any failure as long as you have done your best. Neither glory in your success, but refer all to God in deepest thankfulness.”
If you weren’t Mother Teresa, I’d say that you were a habitual loser trying to mitigate the pain of continual failure. This almost sounds like that politically correct crap that says, “There are no losers.” And yet there is, beneath my drivenness, a desire to believe this.
“If you are discouraged, it is a sign of pride because it shows you trust in your own powers. Never bother about people’s opinions. Be humble and you will never be disturbed. The Lord has willed me here where I am. He will offer a solution.
You’ve got me here. Maybe I do trust in my own “power” too much. OK, let’s drop the maybe… I do trust in my own strength too much. I want to do well. I want to succeed. I want my effort to produce results and when it doesn’t I get frustrated and discouraged.